I have not used my magic carpet for a long time. But last night a friend of mine called and sounded very stressed out. He asked if I can help; I told him I will be at his ranch in a second.
Right after I landed, I realized that he had built this huge zoo on the edge of town. He managed to acquire at least one pair (a male and a female) of every species on the planet. It is quiet impressive actually. I was particularly impressed with the feeding bunks. He figured out a design where animals kept eating and eating and the food never got less or had to be refilled. I thought we just stumbled on the end of world hunger.
As I was feeding the Giganotosaurus, it too got excited and swallowed me. Damn it son, we do not have time for this kind of goofing around. I kept on tickling his stomach from the inside and my friend kept on feeding him, till I came out of the other end. Now I am ready to hear my friend’s story.
As it turned out that my friend’s teenage daughter had disappeared. for 5 full days1. She came back after that and she claimed that she and her friends were lost in the mall all this time and could not find their way out. Couple of weeks after that adventure, she told her dad that she was pregnant. She does not understand that she said, since she never had sex and not only she was a virgin, but sh has never even been kissed by a guy as well.
My friend wanted me to solve that puzzle for him or give him some advice. I told him that this was beyond my pay grade, but I might know a wise man who can help us both. We hopped on my magic carpet again and off we go to Eaststan.
We landed right next the the wise man who was levitating in mid air. He came down to talk to us. As soon as we bowed and approached him, he said "come with me." We started running behind him. Luckily it was a short run to the beach. "You came in a very bad time," he said pointing to the sea. There was a huge Tsunami approaching. But no worries. The wise man lifted his hands in the air and with open palms in front of his shoulders, he started extending his arms forward. And long behold, the Tsunami stopped in the middle of the sea. It was as if we had a spectacular wall of water few hundred yards off the shore. "We do not have much time, we need to clear out," he said. I asked him if he will have time to listen to us and solve our problems in the middle of all of this. "Good point," he said, "we are going to need more time." As he snapped his figures, I felt the earth slidin under my feet. I looked up and I could swear that I saw the sun winking at me and giving me the thumbs up. The universe came to a halt.
We all seemed exhausted and tired. It has been a long day. The wise man knew that. He grabbed couple of beer mugs and started urinating in them. Then he took one and gave us two. "Cheers," he said, "what you got?" Thirsty and overwhelmed by the events, I gobbled what was in the mug before my mind got the chance to think. It was the most refreshing and soothing beer I have ever had. The best part of it, no matter how much I drank, the mug was always full.
After we caught our breath and gathered our strength, we explained to the wise man what we came here to ask him about, my buddy virgin pregnant daughter. To our surprise a soft inquisitive smile showed on the man’s face as he shook his head from left to right. SNAP SNAP, two quick ones. With each "snap" a group of the most gorgeous woman on the planet appeared out of nowhere. As soon as they showed up they started grinding on each other, kissing, going up town and down town, and holy macro this is my kind of town. My friend and I were speechless. "Go ahead and ask them," the wise man said. We could not even talk let alone walk. "Ask them what sir," I replied. "Just walk over there and ask them." he said.
We were more confused than a couple of kids in candy store. We rolled our butts down and "mingled" with the "ladies". I told my buddy, we need to keep this short. We ought to go back to the wise man before the sun goes down. We "mingled" until we felt depleted, used and abused. We barely had strength to retreat to talk with the wise man.
"Well what did you find out," he said. I did not think that it was appropriate to go through the details. "Well sir, they are two identical groups, each had exactly 72 girls, and they all claimed to be virgins. "Exactly, now you explain this rubbish to me," he said.
(1) Egypt largest dimension is its cost line, 1522 mile. Divide that by 40×365 you come up with 0.1027 (miles). Any mall is about 1 to 0.5 mile. 0.5/0.1 = 5.